


About Friends and Lovers

by MyTrashyWriting



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: M/M, Tsukishima opens himself quite a bit here, Yamaguchi talks about girls, and also a little bit about his insecurities, his relationship with them in general
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-25
Updated: 2016-03-25
Packaged: 2018-05-29 02:14:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,214
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6354691
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MyTrashyWriting/pseuds/MyTrashyWriting
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When, while doing homework, Yamaguchi asks Tsukishima why he always refuses the girls who confess to him, he gets rather unexpected answer.</p>
            </blockquote>





	About Friends and Lovers

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this when I was having really hard time and was feeling pretty down. Probably, it was a way of coping so I won't break down more. It helped.
> 
> For some reason, I was listening to the whole Halsey's album [Badlands](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1rfSHisyHdc&list=PLCnlIkn4w0rvoOjrxCVPg8lWDVPE0f4Tn) on repeat, especially [Haunting](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bjyGkvNUtRU). Though it doesn't really have anything to do with the plot.

“Tsukki, can I ask you something?” Yamaguchi said, not quite looking at Tsukishima.

“Which question are you stuck on?” Tsukishima asked, not even glancing away from his math textbook.

“Ah, no, it’s not about homework.”

“Then about what?” Tsukishima put his pencil down and looked at Yamaguchi curiously.

“I… um… you…” suddenly, Yamaguchi wasn’t sure what to say.

“Yeah?”

“Another girl confessed to you today, right?” Yamaguchi finally asked, looking down at his hands.

“Yes. What about it?” Tsukishima furrowed his brows.

“Are you…?” he glanced at Tsukishima and then averted his eyes again.

“No. I refused.”

“Why? I mean… why do you always reject them? A lot of girls who confess to you are very cute. And some of them are even our senpais…”

“Why should I accept?”

“Eh? Um… You aren’t interested? I mean… you don’t want to date?” Yamaguchi was confused.

“I…” Tsukishima fell silent for a moment. “It’s not that I don’t want to…” his voice was quiet.

“Then why?”

“Why should I date someone I don’t know? Apart from the ones from our class, I’ve never talked before with any of the girls who confessed to me. And what do they always say? ‘Oh, Tsukishima-kun, you are so handsome and smart and cool and…’ They aren’t interested in me as a person. It’s only about appearances. So what’s the point?” Tsukishima grumbled. 

“Ah…”

“For me it’s not being friends versus being lovers. It’s being both at the same time. If I were to date someone then I’d want to know them and them to know me at least half as I know you and as you know me. And I’m sure that you’re aware that there’s no-one like that. Because you are the closest person to me and know me the best,” Tsukishima concluded, nervously fiddling with his fingers. 

“Tsukki…” Yamaguchi said quietly, both happy and embarrassed. It was rare for Tsukishima to open up so much.

“Then what about you?” this time it was Tsukishima who asked the question. “What would you do if some random girl you never talked to confessed to you?” his voice was sharp and he sounded irritated.

“Eh? I… I agree with what you just said but… It would also be possible to get to know each other from there? Like maybe… starting as friends and such. It’s not like you have to… to kiss from the very first minute. And, you know, Tsukki… We’re a bit different when it comes to girls, you and I,” Yamaguchi’s voice was slightly strained. 

“Huh? In what way?”

“You said so yourself,” suddenly, words started to flow quickly from Yamaguchi’s lips. “That they say you are smart, handsome and cool. Because you are. It’s true. I agree with them. But on the other hand there’s me. Who’s nothing like this. Girls don’t look at me the way they look at you. Well, yeah, I am tall so maybe I am noticable but that’s all?” he abruptly fell silent, looking at Tsukishima with hints of desperation in his eyes.

“Probably that’s not the answer you’re looking for but I think that you talk much more with girls than I do,” Tsukishima said slowly, a bit unsure where to go with this conversation.

“And it’s always about you!” Yamaguchi huffed. “They never want to talk about me, they don’t even want to talk with me in particular, it’s just that I am close to you, so they think that they can get some absurd and detailed information about you from me. I mean… apart from some, well… let’s call them standard, questions like ‘what does Tsukishima-kun like to eat or what does his room look like’, there are also some weird ones along the lines of ‘what type of underwear does Tsukishima-kun wear’.”

“What?!”

“Yeah, seriously. I got exactly this one two or three weeks ago. Of course I try to dodge every question about you I get. But it’s… you know…”

“And you still ask why I don’t want to bother with them? I’m actually surprised that you even wondered about it. When you experienced such a thing first hand,” Tsukishima was clearly angry.

“If you put it that way… Yeah, you’re right. Sorry, Tsukki,” Yamaguchi smiled sheepishly and lowered his eyes, embarrassed. “Let’s get back to our homework,” he added quietly.

“Yeah…”

They stayed silent for a long time, concentrating on their books. Sometime later, when he was almost done with his homework, Tsukishima quietly called Yamaguchi’s name.

“Hm?” Yamaguchi looked up, slightly confused because of Tsukishima’s tone.

“Have you ever kissed?” he asked, fiddling with his fingers again.

“Wha-? Have you even listened to what I was saying before?” Yamaguchi raised his voice slightly.

“If you want to be nitpicky, then you’ve never said anything about kissing or not. You said that girls talk to you only because you are my friend,” Tsukishima sent Yamaguchi a glare.

“No, I haven’t. There, happy? Why do you even ask something so obvious…” Yamaguchi whined, hiding his face in his hands. “You should know about it, you’re also the closest person to me, so...”

“Yeah, sorry… Then... Do you...” Tsukishima’s voice got quiet again.

“Do I what?”

“No, nevermind,” Tsukishima suddenly snapped out of his weird daze.

“What? Tsukki, don’t do this, don’t start the topic if you don’t want to continue it. Especially when we’re doing homework. I’m not as fast as you with getting it done. And now I’m gonna wonder about what you wanted to say,” Yamaguchi grumbled. “So?”

“I wanted to ask if you want to kiss,” Tsukishima tried to maintain eye contact with Yamaguchi but he broke it after Yamaguchi’s eyes went wide from the surprise.

“Huh?”

“And not in general but like… right now… with me…” his voice was getting quieter with each word. This time it was his turn to hide his face in his hands. “I’m sorry, I think that the talk from before was getting to me, I’m not sure what happened,” after a long while he finally looked at Yamaguchi again.

“I-I think that I wouldn’t mind if it was with you,” Yamaguchi whispered, nervously glancing at Tsukishima.

“Huh?”

“I don’t know, ok? You started it. Are you doing it or not? The situation is weird enough already,” Yamaguchi glared at him weakly. Tsukishima moved closer to Yamaguchi and held his hand.

“You’re trembling,” he chuckled but it was far from his usual taunt.

“You’re the same,” Yamaguchi squeezed his hand and looked right into Tsukishima’s eyes. He flinched when he saw his own reflection in Tsukishima’s glasses.

“Yeah,” Tsukishima whispered and leaned towards Yamaguchi. Both of them tensed when their lips met but they eased soon after. Tsukishima caressed Yamaguchi’s cheek with his free hand, making him gasp in surprise. He tried to deepen the kiss then but he moved clumsily, bumping their teeth together.

“Sorry,” Tsukishima backed off, embarrassed.

“It’s fine,” Yamaguchi chuckled. “You have soft lips,” he whispered, absentmindedly stroking Tsukishima’s lips with his finger.

“Yamaguchi,” Tsukishima grabbed his wrist and looked into Yamaguchi’s eyes. “I…” he couldn’t find the right words for what he wanted to say.

“The dating thing,” Yamaguchi asked quietly, “does it have to be with a girl?”

“No,” Tsukishima shook his head lightly and then leaned to kiss Yamaguchi again.

**Author's Note:**

> Also on [tumblr]().


End file.
